Embrace Your Lane: Marketing Without the Comparison Game
Have a great swim, friend. Need help finding your lane, book a Let’s Talk Copy! call here, and let’s talk.
I’m writing this from a beach in the Caribbean, where the sun is shining, the waves are crashing, and… I’m battling walking pneumonia. Glamorous, right?
This is our third family trip here with my brother, his wife, their kids, my parents, and my little crew. And yet, somehow, it’s shaping up to be the best one yet. Maybe it’s the warm air and surf working their magic—or maybe it’s the fact that being sick has finally silenced my inner comparison queen.
Let me explain.
Before the Trip: The Chaos Olympics
The week leading up to our departure was one for the books. Between wrapping up work projects and packing for everyone (because, let’s be honest, moms pack for the whole family), I managed to come down with a fever that peaked at 103 degrees.
Sunday was a haze of sweating it out, chugging fluids, and debating whether I’d survive this trip. But Monday arrived, and with it came the unrelenting mom-determination. I popped some ibuprofen, loaded the kids and what felt like a Costco’s worth of sunscreen onto the plane, and wrapped myself in layers like a human burrito. The Calm app became my best friend as I powered through an exhausting travel day with one goal: make it to paradise.
A Different Kind of Paradise
Once we arrived, the ocean breeze didn’t magically cure my pneumonia, but it did clear my mind in a way I hadn’t expected.
I spent my days parked on a beach chair, headphones in, listening to audiobooks while my kids built sandcastles and wreaked general havoc. Normally, I’d glance over at my brother and sister-in-law, whose older kids gave them more freedom to sip cocktails and read uninterrupted, and feel that familiar pang of envy.
But not this time. Instead of coveting their freedom, I just enjoyed where I was. I wasn’t trying to measure up or feel “behind”—I was in my lane, fully present.
Even the chaos became enjoyable. Derek and I took all five kids (yes, five!) to a fancy Italian restaurant. Between dodging dive-bombing pigeons and discussing big life dreams over pasta, it was the most fun we’ve had on this trip yet.
And my sister-in-law? She’s rocking her bikini with the confidence of a Sports Illustrated model post-three kids. Meanwhile, I’m embracing my “one-piece, spent-too-much-time-at-my-desk-this-year” era. And for the first time, I’m genuinely okay with it.
Brené Brown and the Art of “Have a Great Swim”
One of the audiobooks I listened to was Brené Brown’s Atlas of the Heart. In it, she dives into the concept of comparison—how it can either motivate us or completely derail us.
She shares a story about her swim practice, where she’d catch herself racing the person in the next lane, sometimes pushing herself so hard she’d get injured. Now, she practices something radically different: she says, “Have a great swim, friend,” to her neighbor under the water and stays focused on her own progress.
That’s exactly where I found myself this trip: focused on my own lane and letting go of the rest. And honestly? It’s a game-changer.
The Comparison Trap in Marketing
Let’s bring this back to business, shall we? Because the same thing happens in marketing all the time.
Everywhere you turn, someone is touting the “ultimate” strategy for growing your business. The “one thing” you absolutely must do to succeed. Instagram is filled with perfectly curated grids of entrepreneurs who seem to have cracked the code while you’re over here trying to figure out why your last post only got three likes. (It’s probably the algorithm. Don’t take it personally.)
It’s easy to feel like you’re falling behind, not doing enough, or missing some secret sauce everyone else seems to have. But here’s the truth: no one’s business is exactly like yours.
That’s not just okay—it’s the point.
Why Your Business Needs Its Own Lane
Your business isn’t a copy-paste template, so why should your marketing be? The strategies that work for someone else might not align with your goals, your audience, or your strengths.
For example:
A course creator with a $100k launch strategy isn’t necessarily your roadmap if you’re focusing on high-ticket, 1:1 services.
If your audience hangs out on LinkedIn, why stress over TikTok trends?
That entrepreneur crushing it with daily reels? Amazing. But if video feels like pulling teeth for you, it’s not your path.
You don’t have to do it all. You just have to do what works for you.
How to Build a Marketing Strategy That’s Yours
So, how do you stop racing the person in the next lane and start crafting a strategy that feels like yours? Here’s what I’ve learned:
Get Crystal Clear on Your Goals
Are you trying to fill a group program? Land high-ticket clients? Drive traffic to your site? The clearer you are about your goals, the easier it is to filter out strategies that don’t align.Know Your Strengths
Hate being on camera? Skip the reels. Love writing? Double down on email marketing. Build your strategy around what you’re good at and what feels natural.Understand Your Audience
Where do they hang out? What do they need? What kind of content resonates with them? The more you understand your ideal clients, the more tailored your marketing can be.Take What You Need, Leave the Rest
Learn from the experts, but don’t treat their strategies as gospel. Test, experiment, and adapt until you find what fits.Commit to Consistency Over Perfection
Marketing isn’t about doing it perfectly—it’s about showing up regularly and building trust over time.
Why It’s Worth the Effort
Here’s the magic: when you build a strategy that feels true to you, marketing stops being a chore and starts feeling… dare I say it… fun.
You’ll attract the clients you actually want to work with—the ones who light you up and value what you bring to the table. And you’ll stop wasting energy trying to be something you’re not.
A Quick Story…
One of my clients came to me after trying to copy a big-name coach’s funnel strategy. She’d spent months creating webinars, email sequences, and landing pages that didn’t feel like her. And surprise, it didn’t work.
When we sat down to rethink her approach, we started with her strengths. She’s a natural conversationalist, so we built a strategy around live workshops and personal outreach. Within weeks, she had her first five-figure client from a simple, authentic approach that felt like her.
That’s the power of staying in your lane.
Marketing your business is a lot like that swim lane metaphor: the magic happens when you stop racing the person next to you and start focusing on your own progress.
So, here’s my challenge to you: the next time you feel that pang of comparison, take a deep breath and say, “Have a great swim, friend.” Then get back to what you’re building.
And if you ever want help mapping out a strategy, writing killer copy, or creating a website that truly works for you, I’m here. Let’s make your lane the one everyone’s inspired by.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be over here recovering from pneumonia in paradise. Cheers to your next great swim, friend.
